WOW moment of the day

Each day Nushki surprises me with a new word that makes me go, Wow thats a first. So I am going to keep appending to this list.

1. Mama - "Anushki don't keep your hands here, its .."
Anushka - "..dangerous"

2. We went to a chemist shop and the guy there handed her a candy. Later ajja asked her who gave her the candy and she said "Uncle"

3. As soon as we entered the park we hit a nice strong breeze and Anushka exclaimed "Wow.. Windy"

Betta now ?

I came back home with 3 bags of fruit for Nushki, she has been refusing milk the last couple of days since she donated her bottles to "Titi" hoping that "Titi" would return it back but Mama says that they now belong to "Titi" and so Anushka is kinda mad now and boycotted the lovely pink bottles I bought for her. Anyways..
I got home and she was busy playing with her bhaiyya, she glanced at me once and gave me a smile but that was it, no hugs, no kisses, not even a Hi. I tried to call her a few times but she was too engrossed in her play and kept saying "No dada. No dada". So I left her alone, patiently waiting my turn to play with her. Later when bhaiyya left she looked around the room and saw Dada sulking in his chair. So she approached me and said Dada's lap, Dada's lap. Now it was my turn to say No, so I said "No Anushka, No Anushka".
Anushka looked confused and looked at Mama for an answer. Mama told her that Dada was sad because you did not kiss him and hug him when he came home. Then Anushka came towards me, planted a sweet kiss on my cheek, gave me a nice hug, looked me in the eyes and said "Better now" ?

I miss my dada,

19th Feb 09

So much!

When I miss my dada, I cry for him. Every morning, I wake up and look to my right side, thinking my Dada is sleeping beside me. I ask Mama, “Where’s Dada”? She says, “Dada Seattle”. I wonder, “Where is Seattle?”

When I play some fun games with Mama and want to share with my dada; I call out for him, “Dada, daaadaaa”. But he never comes. Again Mama says, “Remember Dada is far away in Seattle. Dada airplane”. But I thought Mama said Dada was in Seattle. Now why is he in Airplane?

When I have achieved something and Mama claps for me, again I call out for my dada. But I go to an empty room. Dada’s not there, oh yes, dada is in Seattle.

When Mama gives me High-five, she pretends to fall back as my high-five is very strong. I enjoy this game and would say, “Dada high-five”. I know, dada is away, but I like taking his name.

When I build a house with my blocks, I say, “Show dada, show dada”. Now, Mama only smiles and gives me a big hug. She tells me that we can show it to him when dada comes online.

When I talk to him on the phone, I like no one with me or around me. It’s only me and my dada. I tell him how much I miss him. I tell him how much I am looking forward to playing silly games with him. I tell him about the colors of the cars that I want him to bring. I tell him about the cookies and cakes that I have baked with Mama, and how much I want him to taste it .I tell him about going to school and how much I wish he is there to see me climb and ride the bike. I tell him about the puppies and cats that I see on the road. I tell him about what a big girl I have become. I tell him about how much I love him and hope for him to sit on that airplane and come home soon.

When Mama asks me how much I miss Dada, I bring out my two arms and say, “So much”!

When I miss my precious Dada, I spend days painting him the BIGGEST and the BESTEST picture.

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Doll Play

20th Feb 09

You are very affectionate towards your dolly. Every morning, right after you wake up, you will call out for her. You massage your dolly, dress and undress her, powder her, feed her milk, share your food with her and sometimes give her a bath (or rather just plunge her in the water, and dolly has to be out in the sun for a few days). Today, after you got up, there were different types of papers for you to explore with. You seemd to be having fun with the different textures and wanted to share this with dolly. Mama handed you your dolly.

"Mama, dolly cry. Wah-wah-wah". (You say it in the cutest way, with your furrowed eyebrows).

"Oh, oh, oh". Dolly hungry.

Looking for something to feed your dolly.

"Dolly, yummy yummy dudu".

"Burp". Mama dolly do burp.

"Okay dolly, time to sleep". You then hum a song to your dolly. (Dolly slept beside you and you went about your exploration).

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My Primitive Baker

12th Feb 09

Mama bakes with me for the first time today. When she put me on the high-chair, I thought it was time for my snack. Instead, I saw a big bowl and a Pyrex cup. Read on to see what fun I had with Mama.

Feeling the flour

Mama handed me a spatula. I tried stirring with it like Spot does in Spot Bakes a Cake.

I liked using my hands better. The flour felt cold and soft on my hands.

Mama showing me how to mix the oil and brown sugar.

"Whee"! I enjoyed stirring the sugar.

Mama mashing the bananas.

Somehow the flour was more interesting. Something about the texture.

I decided to give Mama a helping hand by stirring it for her. The batter seemed to be getting thicker.

Oatmeal and chocolate chips were added in the batter. The spoon was stuck and I could barely stir it now.

Letting Mama taste my batter. She seemed satisfied with it.

Taking a break while the cookies are in the oven.

Tada! My banana chocolate chip cookies are ready.

I helped Mama with the clean-up too.

Cookies taste even more delicious when shared with my Bhaiya.

Part 2.

Painting was the last activity for the day. When Anushka saw the paint and brushes, she got very excited and pulled me towards the table. The children sat down; some put on an art apron, others not so interested in it. The teacher then announced, “Here are two colors, red and green, but please do not mix the colors as they will get smudge”. I looked at that damn teacher and thought she must be kidding. Maybe my head was spinning too much from the day’s activity and I might have heard her wrong. Why will a teacher say that? I brushed off my silly thoughts and was reaching out to hand Anushka both the paint when the teacher said it again. This time I was wide awake, no thoughts or no spinning head. “Please do not mix the colors as they will get smudge”, said the teacher. That stupid woman really said that. I was dumb-founded. Can any “trained” teacher say that? Can they? Do they?

At this point of time, I really wanted to take my child and run out of the door. But Anushka was comfortably sitting on the tiny chair all ready for the paint and brush, that I did not have the heart to leave just like that. The teacher started handing out cut-outs of fish, (why was I not surprised), and gave one to Anushka too. Anushka so politely said, “thank you”. I looked at her and praised her for using such polite words. Even the teacher was surprised.

Everyone got busy. When I say everyone, I mean the parents; they got busy painting for their child. One mom just took the brush from the child and started painting one side of the fish; green and the other side; red. Wow, very pretty, I thought. Some other moms were “teaching” their child to paint. The dad was literally begging his child to finish painting the fish. Everyone’s art work looked very beautiful; the fish looked very neat and pretty. Anushka was painting her piece of fish cut out, and since I did not help her at all, she had blotches here and there. After painting for a while, she decided to just do “dots, dots” with her brush. The teacher then took the brush from her and said, “Anushka, look paint it like this”. She started painting the white blotches. I got enraged and said, “Let her do it by herself”. The teacher was taken aback and quickly returned the brush. I felt good about standing up for my daughter.

It was time to clean up, and I quickly left for the washroom. I had enough. My head was THROBBING!

I went back to the office and P; the co-coordinator asked me how it went. At first I said, it was okay, but felt that I had to voice out my opinions. This was the conversation.

Me: Why do I feel like the children were forced into doing the activities?

P: What makes you say that? Can you give an example?

Me: I talked about the ball incident.

P: Maybe this is your first time here and you feel like what you are feeling, whereas these children are here for a long time now, and it has become a routine for them.

(She did not understand my point. Just then the owner walked in; a middle-aged Punjabi looking women).

P: Madam, she has something to tell you about the program. She feels that the children are being forced.

Mad: Yes, tell me.

Me: I feel like the children are not allowed any freedom. All the time they are being told what to do, where to go and how to do it. I talked about the ball incident and asked her how it is possible to have five balls for twelve toddlers.

Mad: Well, maybe the teacher had something in mind, and that is why she had five balls out. Maybe your child saw a ball for the first time and got berserk, others did not.

Me: You don’t get my point, do you? Mad: No, tell me.Me: It’s not about my child going berserk over a ball, yes she did and so did the rest. Of course a child will go crazy over a ball; they just love that thing and want a piece of it. What I am trying to say is, they are too many instructions for the little ones, and they were just not given the freedom to do anything.

Mad: I think since this is your first time, you felt a little overwhelmed with all these instructions and routines. These children are here for a few months now and they are used to it. And instructions are good for them; they need it as it helps them to know what is right or wrong.

(Gosh, another dumb cow. Who was I talking to? Either she was acting stupid or she just could not get my point. FREEDOM!!)

Me: I think maybe I am not making sense here. They do need instructions; but do they need instructions for every little thing; play like this, kick that way, paint it this way. Are there right or wrong way to paint? Then I went on about telling her the paint incident.

Mad: (She turned to the other coordinator and asked her which teacher was in that classroom). Yes, so you did not like the painting.

Me: Well, the teacher told us not to mix the colors, and I found that ridiculous. A new color could be created by mixing two colors. And she also took the brush from my child’s hand and started painting for her. Why did she do that? Again, doesn’t this show the kind of “freedom” you give to your children here”.

Mad: R, could you please tell so and so not to paint for the children. We have to talk to the teachers about it. Can you please talk to her? (R, murmurs a yes).

Me: The other parents can’t see it, maybe because they are just parents. But I am a teacher and I see it from another perspective.

Mad: Maybe. (And she just walked away)

I was about to leave this outrageous place when P asked me how long have I been a teacher and where have I taught. She came out and gave me some numbers to call and told me that they need teachers at Kangaroo kids. She said I could fit in very well. She asked me if I was interested in working. I replied, “I had a very overwhelming day today. I cannot think. I just need to take that rickshaw and go back home with my daughter. I will call you once I have overcome this day. She looked at me and smiled and said not to worry too much about it and that Kangaroo Kids are much better as the teachers there are more experienced and they know what they are doing. Well, now she tells me that! And I thought your teachers were trained “twice” before entering your school!

I kicked myself for taking Anushka to such a place, in fact I felt awful as I told her that she was going to a fun place where there will be books to read, toys to play and other fun things to do. This was really a horrible experience for my daughter and me. It was hard to believe the way these toddlers were treated. The whole concept of mother-toddler program is so different here. It was too just painful to see from a teacher’s point of view. My child will definitely thrive much better at home.

Anushka's Horrible Experience at School- Part 1

Dear readers
WARNING! WARNING! This might be my longest post, so read it at your own risk. I have written it in two parts. this is my first part.

We reached the school promptly at 9.30am and reported to the coordinator; P .We introduced ourselves and was briefed a little by R, the program coordinator. She explained what the mother-toddler program is about and how it is conducted. She was very clearly trying to sell her program to me. She seemed a little arrogant and was also a little pushy. Immediately, she suggested that we should sign the forms and attend school the very next day. We told her that we would like to see her school and attend a session of it. P then took me around the school, (by this time, Rahul had to leave for his meeting), and showed me the different rooms. I was pretty impressed that various activities were conducted in smaller classes and that mom and their tots would go from one class to the other. The last room she showed me was the computer room. I asked, "Computer room for a year old"? And she replied, "Yeah, children love computers right, so we try to make it fun and let them "watch" the computer". Okay, I thought.

Anushka and I were looking at the huge fish tank as we had a couple of minutes before the class started. Anushka was mesmerized by the fishes. Soon, we went into the class and there I saw baskets on the floor with fake money in it. There was a teacher on the stage who pretended to be a grocer; selling various fruits and vegetables. She told the children to get a basket and come up the front to buy vegetables or fruits. All the parents did as they were told, and I too led Anushka to the pretend grocer. Toddlers were eagerly looking around to see the various fruits and vegetables, all this while the pretend grocer aka the teacher was shouting out like a typical "bhaji walla or rather bhaji walli".

Moms then started hurrying their toddlers and made them pick up a fruit of their own choice. I on the other hand showed Anushka the fruits and vegetables that were placed on the stand and asked her what she would like. She told me purple, as in the brinjal, so I picked that up and gave it to her. She then said peppers and apple; I asked her if she would like to pick it up on her own. She said "haa" and then slowly retreat her hand to pick it up. She also wanted strawberries, and I probed further by asking her how many strawberries she wanted. She replied by saying two. The grocer then said, "Anushka pay me some money". And I showed Anushka the pretend money that she had in her basket and told her to pay the grocer.

All the children began playing with their fruits and vegetables; examining it, feeling it, and tossing it and some even tasting it. Anushka too tasted her strawberries. The children seemed to enjoy this activity, but before I knew it, it was time to put away the fruits and veg. They sang a song to put away these things.
After the clean up, there was a puppet play, or rather a circle time. One of the teachers was singing a song, and the other was hidden behind a puppet stage showing the various sea puppets. One of the children wanted to touch the lobster, but his mom held on to this shirt so tight and pulled him back. The teacher neither encouraged the child to come up nor say anything! Maybe this is what circle time meant to them.

Then, there was a song about a snow man. Every child was given a snowman book and they sang the song twice and again it was time to put the book away. One of the children was not ready to do so, and the dad said that "It’s ok, let her hold it for a while, and she will give it back". But the teacher, oh the teacher, was adamant on taking it back and making the child upset! After this, there was a name song, where the teacher showed a book with pictures of individual children. They sang a song like this, "Where is Arya, where is Arya, there she is, there she is...”. Then it came to a child who was not present. They sang the most horrible rhyme in Hindi. It went something like this, ("Where is Julie? Oh Julie is not here today, why is she not here. She has high fever, she has gone to the doctor and the doctor gave her the biggest injection. Julie cried so much as it hurt her.) What the hell! This is what you teach a child about doctors. Not bad! One thing I was pissed about was, after the teacher mentioned everyone’s name, she looked at us and did not bother introducing us to the group. Yes, just looked at Anushka and expect Anushka to know that she is welcomed to the class. How can they be such idiots! How can they not introduce someone who is new to the group! It’s just like when you meet someone new, you introduce yourselves just to make yourself feel comfortable. So this was my first peeve; of course there were many before my first, but this was it!

Later on, we went to the GYM class. There was another teacher in the gym class, and some sort of a rehearsal was going on, I was told that there will be a concert for these toddlers and hence the practice. I was asked to sit down and watch; I sat down and watched. What a performance! All the children were forced to act upon the teacher's and their moms' wishes. No one was allowed to run away to climb or jump, or play with the toys, but DANCE like their teacher and their moms.

Okay, why will they want to have a concert for a year old? What’s the purpose here? First of all, the room had some jumping and climbing equipments, and cool manipulative were lying on the table. How do you expect a one year old to follow instructions when these fun and interesting things are inviting them to play? Anushka kept asking for the toys, as I had told her that we are going to a school and there will be toys to play with, books to read and many other things to do. She insisted on having the toy and I wondered if I should hand it to her or not. What if I do, and some other child would want to play too, and the teacher would not be happy as she has her ACT to finish.

After clearing my thoughts, and seeing that other children were playing with the toys, I handed some to Anushka. Boy oh boy! The teacher saw it and immediately said, “Mummy, can you please put the toy away?" Put the toy away, then why the freaking hell is it out there? If it’s not meant to play, then you PUT it away, you dumb cow! How can a one year old resist playing with toys and climbing? HOW? HOW? HOW?

After the wonderful concert was over, the teacher took out 5 balls. 5 balls for 12 toddlers! I think even my youngest sister will know that this is the biggest NO, NO! How can you have 5 balls for 12 toddlers! Well at least my child goes berserk when seeing a ball, I don’t know about others. Each wanted a piece of that ball, and since there weren’t enough, there was utter chaos in that classroom. The teacher quickly suggested that we should play dodge ball; meaning the parents form a circle, and the children will be inside the circle. The parents will throw the ball to a particular child, and if it hits that child, he or she is out, but since they are young, they still get to stay inside. Seriously, I was losing it! Was she just plain stupid or what?

However the parents tried to play the game but were unsuccessful. So then the teacher said, “Okay parents, how about you pair up and roll the ball to your child but do not let your child touch the ball”. So the parents followed suit. I think by this time the toddlers had it! Some howled their loudest cry and a few displayed the most outrageous tantrums I had ever seen. This might have terrified the teacher and she quickly went to the nearest cupboard and took out hundreds of smaller plastic balls. The children stopped whatever they were doing and hurried to get the balls. Anushka was thrilled to see those balls, and she pulled me to wherever she was going and started picking up the balls like there weren’t a tomorrow. As if that was not enough, she put some under her arms and wanted me to carry some for her. (How long this activity lasted, don’t even get me started, or else I will never be able to finish writing this post.)

We were led into the language room where we got to read books to the children. Anushka picked up some books and sat on a chair. She began to flip the pages when she realized that she wanted another book. She got up and went to look into the box. She saw another girl coming to get some books; she looked at her and said, “Book”, and then offered her the book. That was such a sweet gesture. Again she sat on that chair and began to read the book, but before I could even turn to the next page, it was time to PUT AWAY the book. I just could not believe it. Why are they hurrying the child like that? There weren’t one activity that lasted more than five minutes. What were they trying to achieve by doing this?

Semi-circle Moon

3rd Feb 09

Dada and you were walking back from the playground. You stopped and looked. You then said, "Dada, semi-circle moon". Dada too stopped and looked. Indeed, he saw a semi-circle moon. He was very surprised that you were able to distinguish between a semi-circle and a crescent moon. It was only two days back where you told him that you saw a crescent moon. Dada gave you a tight hug.

Few weeks ago, Mama took out some foam shapes for you to play with. You would look at the different shapes and asked, "What's that?" We would then tell you if it was a circle, diamond, heart, triangle, square, semi-circle or crescent. We were at a book store and dada picked up "tiny tiny" books for you and one of the book were about Shapes. Instantly, that became your favorite book for the week. We sat in the store and I pointed out the shapes to you. Within minutes, you were able to tell me the crescent and semi-circle shape. We read the book at least once in a day, and after the second day, you could tell us almost all of the shapes in the book. We were amazed at how fast you picked up.

You have been pointing to us circles and stars for two months now, but to know such words and relate it to the actual shape, is really amazing. Now you see shapes everywhere. You saw pentagons and trapezium and wanted to know what those were, and all I could think to myself, "Soon she will be teaching her mother".