Reality of private ownership

We were invited to our friends place for dinner; a family with an 8 year old girl and a teenage son. Upon reaching there, we exchanged our hellos and introduced you to their grandfather. At first, you were sitting quietly on my lap with your head down but your eyes were busily checking the new faces and the environment. Each time someone said hello to you, you would look up and smile shyly and then look down again; but the eyes were still busy doing its own things. Later on, their daughter, Saatchi, brought some stuffed animals for you to play with. You looked at all the animals; but were very interested in the tiny teddy bear. You started playing with the teddy bear and kept saying Mine. Mama kept reminding you that it belongs to someone else and we have to return it after we leave.

Once you warmed up, you started exploring the place; you crawled in the kitchen, in their bedroom and almost got into their bathroom. Saatchi and her mother were playing catch-catch with you. Saatchi had a big ball and she was playing peek-a-boo with you. When you found her, you burst into laughter and wanted to play all over again. You got bored of her game and initiated your own, you wanted her to come and catch you and so crawled away; all this while, you were holding on to the tiny bear and kept assuring yourself by saying; Mine.

Soon it was time to go and dada told you that you had to give the bear back to Saatchi. You shook your head and said MINE, MINE! Dada and mama then told you that it belongs to Saatchi and that she will be sad if you take her bear away . But how much of this would you have understood?? Mama tried again but then you started to cry and were not ready to part with the stuffed toy. It was nice of Saatchi’s mom to say that it does not matter and that you can keep the bear. Well, I knew Saatchi was sad and wanted her to have her teddy bear back. When we sat in the car, dada distracted you and took the bear from your hands and gave it to Saatchi. You began to protest but mama quickly handed you your fishy toy and you seemed content. When we drove off, you kept signing Bear; you remembered the bear and wanted it. That was your first encounter with the reality of private ownership. Dada felt very bad that he had to take the toy out of your hands like that; he felt that he was cheating you in some ways. He told me that he was going to buy the exact bear the very next weekend. Hmm, mama too felt sorry that she could not think of a better way for you to give up the toy; but found myself smiling when dada said that he would buy you the same toy.

(I have always liked this rule and wanted to share it with all)

Toddler Property Rules
If I like it, it's mine.
If it's in my hand, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
If I'm doing or building something, all the pieces are mine.
If it looks just like mine, it's mine.
If I think it's mine, it's mine.
(http://www.inspiredinside.com/humor/humor_ToddlerRules.htm )

The artist

Anushka is beginning to learn the art of flattery, isn't that amazing, a 16 month old knowing how to be diplomatic and get her way, babies are so clever.
This is what happened today - I was lying on the sofa and started reading a book which apparently had a very attractive cover page and that caught her attention immediately. Usually she rushes to me and starts saying "Mine Mine" and I bluntly refuse saying "No Mine, Its Mine" and turn down her request and after a few attempts she leaves me alone and goes back to what she was doing. Today however she chose to approach this differently. Having learnt from her past experience she decided that some flattery would probably get her what she wanted. So she slowly crawled up to me and then stood by my side. She had the most disarming smile on her face, then she titled her head slightly and said "Dada" maintaining that smile, looking straight at me and not letting me know that it was really the book she was after. I said "Hi Shona" and she repeated "Dada.." As I continued to read the book she respectfully stood by and peeked over my shoulder trying to read it. She slowly started touching it saying "Wow".. and then wanted to flip some pages and finally she could not take it anymore and started with the "Mine ?".. Mine, Mine..
Of course I let her have the book this time, how could I not after all the efforts she had put into this !

Not the bug again!

Another post from a distraught mama....

Few weeks ago, I wrote about how well you were adjusting to this new environment, maybe; just maybe, I said it a little too early. You were down with the bug; cold and cough and a HORRIBLE stomach upset. You were going to potty Four times in a day and your stools did not look good. Your cold and cough too was really bad and you sounded all stuffed up. We took you to this doc (I like this doc the best, as he never rushed to prescribe you anti-biotic) who knew that we are not from here and then went on saying that you are just adjusting to this new environment and the bacteria! He did not show any concern regarding your diarrhea; he said that it happens, nothing to be alarmed about. How can I not be? Four or five times in the potty. Anyways he gave you some natural medications and sent us home.

Somehow the doctors here aren’t as gentle as the doctors back in US. In the US, your doctor Sarah took her time to examine you and would woo you if you showed a sign of discomfort. Over here, nothing of that! They are in a hurry to examine you; their touch is just too rough on a gentle baby’s skin. Being a pediatrician, how can they be so rough? Your dada says that they have to be efficient over here, there are just too many patients out there waiting, hence this type of handling. If only I could explain that to you. The looks you give me when someone is touching you like that; is as if you are telling me, “Mama, I don’t like this, why aren’t you stopping it? I wish I could tell you something; but what? That what he is doing is for your own good? How can it be good if you are crying? Oh baby, mama wished too that the doctors here be just a little gentler; but all I can do is to be there for you when you cry, to hold and comfort you and to tell you that it will be over soon.

Vale, Vale.

My hubby gave me the privilege of writing a post in his blog, so I thought why not write something about him and Anushka. I went through my posts in my "private" blog and felt this was a special one to blog about. Then, Anushka was eight months old.

Dada playfully lifted you overhead and said, "Vale, vale. You started chuckling with delight and kicked your legs. When dada stopped, you kicked your legs even harder as if to tell him you wanted more. Dada then started saying, "Vale, vale. You gave out your loudest belly laughter. No words were exchanged but your actions were met with actions from your dad that told him that he got your message.

Though preverbal, but an amazing expressive kind of communication was going on between the two of them, just to beautiful that I had to write it.

Sonia

Vocabulary

So we started to count words that our toothless wonder (well now she has 2.75 teeth) can say and were surprised at the number, it was well over 40. Lets see how many I can recollect
mama, dada, ajja, akka, nani, nana, aashna
apple, onion, pepper, chapati,
tractor, car, bike
mine, wow, baby
eyes, ears, knees, hair, cheeks, nose,
hi, bye, where is it, out,
meow,
yes, and of course NO.

OMG She has discovered the word "No"

First of all, my apologies for the prolonged absence, thanks for keeping the faith and welcome back !

I had an epiphany today, I have those once in a while and when I do my day goes really well because I am convinced that I have realized something that is so simple and makes complete sense and yet most people have probably not thought about it. So today was one of those days, want to hear about it ? ok here goes..

In life we are always trying to do better, in our professional lives we train ourselves to be the best, exercise to keep ourselves fit (well most do), seek advice from experts on matters of health and well being, read books, talk to friends, etc the point is that we are always seeking information and training ourselves to do well. Yet, when it comes to parenting I am sure most parents don't spare a thought to seek "training" on how to be good parents. They simply rely on their natural instincts when it comes to parenting. Parents spend a great deal of time interracting with their kids, teaching them stuff, trying to control their behavior etc so doesn't it make sense that they get trained on how to be good parents from professionals in this field ? Shouldn't we learn more about parenting techniques and try to sharpen this skill ? And yet, I have not come across any Parenting Academy that teaches us more about how and why kids behave the way they do and how we should cope with it. So that was my "Hmm that makes sense, why does anyone not think about it" moment of the day.

My wife picked up the "Happiest Toddler on the Block" book and I began reading it today, currently on page 33 of 290, so still a long way to go but the author already has my attention. Atleast once on each page I go "Oh wow, yes Anushka does that", for example snatching things and saying "Mine !", classic Neanderthal behavior, the author says that children this age are like Neanderthals, or early humans. She has also developed a "fake" attention cry now, she actually looks pretty cute going "Ooo Ooo Ooo" with her frowned eyebrows trying to guage how her parents are going to react.

Anushka is getting cuter by the day, she is growing up too fast, displaying signs of being a toddler now and telling us "Mama, Dada, Ready or not here I come"...

Happy Mothers day

Mammaaa

Happy Mothers Day ! I hope you liked the waffles and chai I made for you this morning. I had so many plans and wanted to do a lot more but Dad just did not understand what I was trying to tell him.

You are the best Mommy in the world !

You were up in the wee hours of the morning and sometimes late in the night to pump milk for me. You prepared fresh meals for me everyday, made fresh fruit yogurts and breakfast cereal, none of that yucky Gerber jar stuff.

You are the best Mommy in the world !

I love music because you played music to me when I was in your tummy. You bought so many nice CDs for me. The afternoon music sessions, all the musical toys you made for me, the creative dance lessons, I have enjoyed everything so much.

You are the best Mommy in the world !

Cloth diapers !! You have no idea how much we babies love cloth diapers, they are so comfy. For you it meant running a laundry service at home - gosh sometimes I could not believe the number of dirty diapers I had in a day.

You are the best Mommy in the world !

You started reading books to me when I was 3 weeks old and now I am a voracious reader. The baby signs you taught me helped me to communicate and tell you when I was sleepy or wanted milk. The wonderful baby carriers that put me to sleep on our afternoon walks, buying paint for me and allowing me to create art, the wonderful baby games you played with me.. I think the list is endless.

At the end of the day there is nothing more comforting to me than being rocked to sleep in your arms.

I love you Mom !

You are my world !

Birdie Birdie

If I were asked to guess what Anushki would grow up to be - I would guess ornithologist (yes I googled it). She absolutely loves birds. When she sees a bird her hands go up in the air, doing the birdie sign going "uh uh uh" telling us that there is a birdie nearby. Thats a change I have noticed, before she would enjoy it herself, now she calls our attention and wants to share the excitement. A trip to the nearbly lake is usually a real treat for her, she sees birdies and ducks which I think are her next favourite thing.

We went to a zoo last weekend and she had great fun watching all the animals. Her reaction in the bear's cave was hillarious. A huge grizzly bear lie quietly in its den and right infront was a small pond with fish and some ducks. We could see this through a big glass window. When we entered the place, Anushka totally ignored the bear (she did not realize there was a bear) but was captivated by fish and the ducks. After a while, the grizzly bear woke up from its slumber to check out the audience and when it did, Anushka's eyes opened up wide and she went "O".

My darling has started crawling everywhere now, on her tummy, commando-style. I think its time to make a trip to the store to child-proof the place. Next up - I'll post a video of her crawling, stay tuned...

Daddyasal

That means "longs for Daddy". These days Anushki just wants to be with me and I am loving it. It is just a phase I guess, I don't get to see her 3 days of the week because of long working hours, so when I am home I think she wants to be with me.

Yesterday I had two accomplishments. I recognized that she wanted to go potty, and later on I put her to sleep, which has almost never happened before. She always wants her Mom when she is sleepy. She looks really cute on her little potty, she even grabs on to something when she is trying hard, my baby is so focussed :-)

Oxford of the East

The city of Pune was called the "Oxford of the East" by the late Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru, due to its popularity with students from all over the world. Why am I talking about Pune ? Because we will be moving there soon. I have decided to accept a job offer from a US based company that has an office in Pune.

I am very excited to move to Pune, we will be close to Mumbai and to Singapore as well. But this is Anushka's blog, so I am going to write about what her thoughts might be on the subject. I wonder if Anushka will feel the difference, I'm sure she will think that we are on another trip and that soon she will be back in her own home, her play area in the loft, the bathtub, the backyard.. wonder if she will miss it ? She will see so many new faces, grand parents, great grand parents, uncles, aunts, cousins, oh she is going to get a lot of attention in the first few months. I wonder if she will be overwhelmed by all the activity around her and how much time will it take for her to get accustomed to it. Will she miss the big, bright and colorful aisles of the grocery stores here and wonder why vegetables are being delivered at the door now ?

My first entry

Green Lake

She is always very excited when we get her car seat out because she knows we are going out for a ride, but most of the times its the routine trip to the grocery store. But I think today even she knew that this was going to be much more fun, the sun was out, Mom was wearing a cool outfit, Papa was getting his camera bag ready, oh this was going to be a fun little outing.

We met Helena (Leena) at Green Lake park today. Anushka and Leena started checking each other out the minute they settled down. After a while they were tugging on each other's caps and sweaters. It feels great to see Anushka's progress, a few weeks ago she would be nervous and even start to cry if another baby got very close to her and started to touch her. Now she is not afraid to get close to them , touch and even pull things out of their hands.